[ open texting meme ]

[runawayballista]

gen texting, tfln, whatever. u know the drill

Comments

i

[epsilol]

friends is a really fucking strong word for the people we know
who do you think is hot out of the idiots we hang out with
and don't say wash that's gross

1/2

[geographist]

fucking gross, man. that dude's only hobbies are working out and staring into the middle distance. who the fuck would wanna do body shots off the sweaty toned abs of the biggest fucking buzzkill in project freelancer?

2/2

[geographist]

wait fuck that came out wrong

[epsilol]

no go on about how you want to do body shots off wash's abs
that's definitely the straightest thing you could do
wanna wax poetic about simmons's arms next?

[geographist]

oh fuck you, dude. i have standards and they do NOT include someone who's been taping their glasses together since third grade. you want me to tell carolina about how you've been making eyes with the microwave in our base?

[epsilol]

so you have standards for your homoerotic lust and wash meets them but simmons doesn't
interesting
now i want more data
where does grif sit on the spectrum

[geographist]

dude, i am not playing hot or not with the fucking red team. or blue team. or any team.

[epsilol]

more like smash or pass
come on tucker
it's sex science
it's your favorite kind

1/2

[geographist]

uh, no science is my favorite, because i'm not a fucking nerd
idk man you are way fixating on this. is there something you wanna tell me, church

[geographist]

fuck never mind whatever it is i do NOT want to hear it

[epsilol]

i'm bored and winding you up is fun
plus there's a 67% chance you're bi and in denial about it

[geographist]

you know what? i take it back. i don't have any hot friends because i don't have any friends here. 

[epsilol]

denial is an ugly thing man
i notice you didn't acknowledge the sexuality thing
which raises it to 78%

[geographist]

i didn't acknowledge it because i don't want to fucking talk about it, asshole!
also, "winding up"? which one of us sounds more like a raging homosexual right now?

[epsilol]

dude
chill the fuck out it isn't a bad thing be bi
except for the lusting after wash thing
that's gross

and there's a decent chance i'm into guys
it isn't a big deal you big fucking baby

[geographist]

i'm sorry hold the FUCK up. "there's a decent chance"? what the fuck does that mean?

[epsilol]

oh my fucking god dude you are making such a big deal out of this
what do you think it means?

[geographist]

oh no. you answer my question first, asshole. are you actually into dudes?

[epsilol]

in theory?
people are hot
but people are also disgusting and i am not in any rush to test drive anything

[geographist]

dude, that makes no fucking sense
what the fuck am i doing talking sexual preferences with a goddamn computer anyway. like what the fuck would you know. do computers even get horny?

[epsilol]

wow
any other ways you want to remind me i'm not a real boy?
i have memories of what it's like even if i don't have a fucking body

[geographist]

oh boo fucking hoo pinocchio like youve got anything to complain about. you get to hang out with carolina all day
okay fine but what do you like, do about it? can an AI jack off or is it like eternal 8 bit blue balls or whatever?

[epsilol]

actually you know what?
fuck this

[ Enjoy this direct download to your storage that's a supercut of Wash in freelancer. There is a lot of shirtless footage. The director should not have had this many cameras but who was going to tell him no? ]

[geographist]

hey church: what the fuck
this is the weirdest form of cyberbullying ive ever seen and i used to watch youtube videos of people getting catfished