i. you face planted into a car door. and somehow didn't drop your burrito.
ii. last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. i have been texted by princess celestia, scarlet witch, and optimus prime. i have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
iii. okay: whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. this will either be REALLY great or really tragic.
iv. sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made siri read the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE
v. the kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums... i feel like i'm living in jumanji
vi. i just woke up with a bunch of french fries in my hand and a chocolate shake on my pillow. who put me to bed?
vii. rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
viii. i'm honestly considering asking her if i can eat her out, as a friend.
milly (au) / baten kaitos (god forgive me i have sinned)
ii. last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. i have been texted by princess celestia, scarlet witch, and optimus prime. i have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
iii. okay: whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. this will either be REALLY great or really tragic.
iv. sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made siri read the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE
v. the kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums... i feel like i'm living in jumanji
vi. i just woke up with a bunch of french fries in my hand and a chocolate shake on my pillow. who put me to bed?
vii. rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
viii. i'm honestly considering asking her if i can eat her out, as a friend.